Amber Brown Is Green with Envy Read online

  I, Amber Brown, do not like plaid.

  And I don’t think my mom should have called and made me feel so bad.

  I look at Dylan, who is now playing the accordion while balancing a can of soda on his head.

  I want to cry.

  My dad and Steve walk into the room, carrying bags of groceries.

  Steve looks at Dylan, takes the can of soda off his head and says, “Dylan, my son, let’s call Uncle Hugo, and you can play a song for him on that fine accordion. And if he is not in, you can play every song you know onto his answering machine. I won’t mind paying for that phone bill.”

  “Amber,” my dad says, coming over and giving me a kiss on the top of my head. “We’re going to have dinner up here with Steve and the kids tonight.”

  “Mom and Aunt Pam are going to Disneyland tomorrow,” I tell him.

  My dad says nothing for a minute and then he sighs. “Did your mom send you a postcard and tell you that?”

  “No,” I say. “She called. She misses me.”

  My dad sounds a little angry. “And she doesn’t think that I miss you when you are with her? But I don’t call you up and tell you that.”

  I look at him. “Yes, you do.”

  He starts to say something, but doesn’t.

  Then he says, “Amber in the Middle.”

  I look at him again. “That makes it sound like a game….. but it’s not a fun one.”

  “I know,” he says.

  Polly comes back into the kitchen. “I just heard the accordion recital that Dylan is leaving for Uncle Hugo on his answering machine. Our uncle is going to be very happy that the delete button was invented.”

  That makes me laugh, but I kind of wish that Polly hadn’t come in just now. I wish that Dad and I could have talked more about “Amber in the Middle” and how I feel about that. It’s kind of hard, though, to ask her to leave since this is really her kitchen. And it’s kind of hard for Dad and me to leave because it would seem rude.

  Steve and Dylan come back into the room.

  Dylan is still playing the accordion.

  I wish that someone had given him lessons for Christmas.

  I wish that his uncle had given him a CD with good accordion music on it.

  I’m not sure that I would like accordion music even if it was played well.

  My dad takes out his wallet. “Dylan. Five bucks, just this one time, if you play far, far away every time I ask you to.”

  “I don’t know that song.” Dylan stops squeezing on the accordion.

  “It’s not a song that I’m talking about,” my dad teases. “It’s distance.…I don’t want you to PLAY a song called ‘Far, Far Away’ I want you to GO far, far away to play.”

  I, Amber Brown, know that my dad is kidding around…but I hope that doesn’t make Dylan feel bad.

  Dylan doesn’t, because he turns to everyone and says, “Anyone else willing to make the same deal? Five bucks so that I don’t play the accordion around you.”

  His dad gives him five. I give him one. (Dylan said that I get a junior citizen discount.) Savannah gives him fifty cents. Polly gives him a dollar and fifty cents.

  Dylan counts it up. “Thirteen bucks. My first gig. Maybe I can organize a concert that I promise not to play at……I could make a lot of money that way.”

  Dylan leaves with his accordion.

  Something tells me that this is the best dollar that I have ever spent.

  Soon we are all together again and ready to make soap.

  When the liquid soap comes out of the microwave, we pour it into molds, pick out the dyes that we want to add to it, color the wax, and then put things in it.

  I make mine light red and put the cockroach in it.

  It looks really gross.

  I, Amber Brown, really love it.

  My dad makes one and puts a tiny tennis racket in it.

  I make one for him. It’s got a make-believe cell phone in it. That’s to remind him to stay off the cell phone when we do things.

  It used to make my mom really mad that he was on the cell phone all the time.

  My mom….. I remember….. this time tomorrow she will be in Disneyland.

  Sad.

  I’m not sure what kind of soap I should make her.

  I decide to use the heart mold, put pink soap in it and then add red glitter.

  I decide on that because I love my mom, but also because sometimes I feel like a heart soap that gets goopy/melty after it’s used.

  Polly yells, “Dylan! I hate you.”

  I look over at Dylan and Polly. Polly looks really angry, really angry….. and almost ready to cry. She is staring at the table in front of them.

  I look down.

  She has a lot of Polly Pocket toys, old ones and new ones, little ones and big ones. She doesn’t play with them now that she’s a big kid. She collects them because of her name.

  Dylan’s taken Ice Castle Polly, Vet Polly, Slumber Party Polly and Mermaid Polly and put them into the hardening soap. The heart, circle, shell and star cases are sitting there without their Pollys.

  Steve goes up and looks closely at what Dylan has done.

  Dylan gets sent to his room.

  We try to rescue the Pollys, putting them under hot water to melt the soap.

  The Pollys are freed, a little cleaner…all except for Ice Castle Polly, who has gone down the drain.

  The Pollys are no longer in hot water.

  Dylan still is.

  He has to give Polly the thirteen dollars that he just got….. and seven dollars more.

  We continue to make soap.

  I make one for Max. I put some miniature bowling pins and a tiny bowling ball in his soap cake. Max is the coach of my bowling team.

  My dad looks at it and I can hear him mumble, “I hope that guy strikes out.”

  I, Amber Brown, am a little confused. People get strikes in bowling and that’s a good thing. People strike out in baseball and that’s a bad thing.

  My dad knows sports, and I don’t think he’s confused about strikes in baseball and bowling.

  I think that he’s talking about splits, how Max and Mom should break up.

  It’s a bad thing when my dad does that.

  And I don’t like it when my mom says bad things about my dad either. She does that sometimes, especially after she has talked to him on the phone.

  Sometimes it feels like a sports game and that I, Amber Brown, HAVE to choose one team over the other.

  Chapter

  Five

  Packing.

  I, Amber Brown, am packing to go back to the house where I live with my mom.

  Into my suitcase go the clothes that I brought over.

  Into my knapsack go my schoolbooks with the homework that I did over the holiday.

  It will be great to see Mom.

  I will miss being with Dad and with the Marshalls, but it will be so wonderful to see her and to have some quiet time again…time where Dylan won’t be around, driving me crazy!

  I wonder if Max will be there when I get back. I wonder if he missed Mom almost as much as I did.

  I look around the room.

  Dad and I went shopping for things to decorate, and I got some great stuff.

  On my wall is a large neon clock. It not only keeps time, but if I don’t turn it off, it’s like a giant night-light.

  I also got a purple Lava lamp, which Dad and I named Lana the Lovely Lava Lamp.

  In my closet are a whole bunch of new clothes, ones that will stay here. Dad says that I won’t have to cart a lot of stuff back and forth. But I know that he really wants my new stuff to stay at this house. I wrote little D’s (for Dad’s house) on the labels so that I remember what stays in this house.

  When I get to Mom’s and my house, I’ll write M on the clothes that stay there.

  I look at my clothes once more before I go.

  It was so much fun to shop for them.

  Polly and Brenda went with me to choose things at the stores
where I had gift certificates, the stores that already had after-the-holiday sales.

  Dylan said that to do as much shopping as we did, for so many hours, would have been the worst torture for him.

  I loved shopping with Polly and Brenda.

  After it was all finished, we went to the food court and looked at boys’ rear ends and decided which were the cutest.

  I, Amber Brown, felt like I was a teenager like Polly and Brenda even though I really don’t care about boys’ rears.

  I look in my top dresser drawer….. panties, which I really needed, a bra, which I really don’t need, some socks (glittery), a set of gloves, mittens and a scarf (all purple).

  In the next drawer are four pairs of the black pants that I love to wear. (I know what I like!)….. Also two T-shirts and four long-sleeve shirts.

  Also a fuchsia sweater, a pink sweatshirt, two purple tops, three nightgowns and one pair of pajamas (with the feet and the trapdoor back!).

  Dylan may think that shopping is awful…but I think that it should be an Olympic event.

  I look at my new watch.

  The other one that I have, the one that I used to love so much and be so proud of…when I got it in the second grade…seems kind of baby now.…It is in my jewelry box. I bought one like the one that Polly has….. black and silver with little rhinestones in it. I think that it’s okay to wear the same watch at both houses.…I don’t know what the rules are on that one.

  I wish I had a divorce rules book, but I still haven’t found one.

  “Amber, honey,” my dad says, knocking on the door. “Almost ready? Your mother said that she wants you back at the house by four o’clock. And you know that when your mother wants something, she gets cranky when she doesn’t get it….. and we don’t want that to happen, do we?”

  I don’t know what happened when my dad spoke to my mom, but he sure got into a terrible mood.

  I, Amber Brown, think that he is getting very cranky, and it’s making me nervous.

  I had such a good time until now, when I have to leave.

  My dad puts the luggage into the trunk of the car, and we drive to my other house.

  Dad hasn’t said anything since we got into the car.

  I try to make things nice. “Dad, I had a really good time. I’ll be back for a visit soon.”

  That doesn’t make things nice.

  He makes a face. “It’s not just a visit,” he says. “You live with me too.”

  I don’t know what to say.

  I don’t know why I said “visit.”

  I wish that my father wasn’t acting like this. He was so much fun over the whole vacation.

  We get to my mom’s and my house.

  My dad takes the luggage out of the trunk and says, “Amber, honey….. I’m sorry that I am in this lousy mood. I just hate to see you go…. and I don’t like to be bossed around by your mother.”

  As far as I can figure out, all that my mom said was that I had to be home by four because she and Max and I had dinner reservations at six, and she wanted me to get settled first.

  Now my dad is in a totally awful mood.

  “Dad,” I say, “I can take my luggage in myself.”

  He just looks at me. “All of this?”

  “I can make a couple of trips,” I say.

  My dad picks up the bags. “They are too heavy, honey. I don’t mind carrying them….. anything for my girl, who, by the way, I am going to miss very much.”

  “Me too,” I say. “I’m going to miss you.”

  It’s true. I will miss him, but I really do want to see Mom and Max right now. I just don’t want to let him know that and have him feel really bad.

  The front door opens.

  “Amber,” my mom says, holding out her arms for me.

  We hug, and then Max hugs me.

  My dad steps up and then walks to the door. “Where do you want me to put these?”

  Max answers, “You can just leave them inside the door.”

  My dad nods and walks inside with the luggage.

  As he goes in, a piece of luggage sort of hits Max’s leg a little.

  It looks like Max is going to say something, but then he doesn’t.

  My mom says, “Phil, while you are here, would you like to come in and we can talk about Amber’s schedule for the next few weeks? We have some plans that need to be worked out.”

  “I have some plans too,” my dad says.

  Max puts his arm around my mom’s waist and says, “I’ll go get some soda for everyone. I know what everyone else likes, but what should I get for you, Phil?”

  “My usual, a root beer,” my dad tells him.

  “We don’t have root beers in the house anymore,” my mom says.

  My dad shakes his head. “You still have water, yes?”

  She nods.

  I, Amber Brown, am feeling very uncomfortable.

  Max returns with the drinks and sits down on the couch next to Mom.

  I wish that they hadn’t asked my dad to come into the house now.

  My dad looks around the room. “What ever happened to that picture that my mother gave us for our wedding?”

  “It’s in the attic,” my mother says. “I put it there with a lot of other things.”

  I remember the day that she went all over the house, taking things down, packing things up and putting them in the attic.

  My dad looks at a beautiful bowl that is on the table. It’s a brownish color and written on it is the word AMBER. “I remember the day that I bought that bowl for you. It was the day that Amber was born.”

  My mom smiles for a minute.

  Then my dad looks around the room and starts naming other things that he gave Mom or that they bought together.

  He accidentally spills some of his water on the table and stands up. “I’ll clean it up. Is the towel rack in the same place it always was? Remember how much trouble I had getting that on the wall?”

  My mom looks uncomfortable.

  Max looks uncomfortable.

  I feel uncomfortable.

  I wish that my dad would leave soon.

  My mom looks at Max. “I’ll go talk to Philip in the kitchen for a minute and work out the schedule.”

  When she leaves, Max says, “Amber, you are going to love the souvenirs that we brought back for you from Disneyland.”

  WE….. WE….. I think.

  “I thought Mom went alone,” I say quietly. “I thought you were here, in New Jersey, in your apartment.”

  Max makes a face. “Oh, right……Well, I missed your mom so much that I went out to California and stayed in a hotel while your mom stayed at Aunt Pam’s.”

  Somehow it really doesn’t seem fair that Max and Mom got to go to Disneyland. Somehow, I wish that I had known that Max was there so I wouldn’t have wasted my time worrying about him missing Mom.

  My dad and mom come back into the living room.

  They don’t look very happy.

  “Time for me to go, honey,” my dad says to me. “I’m going to miss you.”

  We hug.

  As he leaves, he turns to Max and says, “If there’s ever a problem with anything in the house, just give me a call. I know how everything works here and I’ll be glad to show you how to fix it.”

  Mom and Max don’t look happy when he says that.

  Somehow, I don’t think that they are going to be asking for his help.

  After Dad has gone, I look at Max and Mom, who are looking at each other. They look angry. I know that they are not saying anything in front of me.

  Max carries the bags up to my room, and I get dressed for the restaurant.

  Max and Mom talk downstairs.

  When we get to the restaurant, I sit down to hear their news.

  It can’t be that they are getting married.

  I already know that.

  Mom looks at me very seriously. “Amber, Max and I have already talked about this at great length. I realize that you may have some feelings about this…..
but we want to let you know that we are not going to stay in THAT house. We are going to move.”

  Move. We can’t move. We just can’t move. I’ve lived in THAT house for my whole entire life.

  My mom continues, “We want to be in a house where we can have people come to OUR house, Max’s and my house…and your house. Where Max and I and you can create our own history.”

  I feel like I’ve been hit by a ton of wet noodles, mixed in cement sauce.

  “When? Where?” I want to know.

  “When? Soon,” Mom says. “Where? We don’t know.”

  “In the same town?” My voice is getting a little louder.

  Mom shrugs. “We don’t know yet.”

  I don’t want to move to another house, to another town.

  I want to stay right where I am.

  I don’t know what to do, what to feel, what to say.

  For once in my life, I, Amber Brown, am speechless.

  Chapter

  Six

  January 11.

  I’m back in school.

  Life as I know it is over.

  Mom and Max weren’t kidding.

  We are really going to move. They are already looking at houses. When they find a house or houses they like, they will show them to me, and I can help them decide. I like that they want me to help them decide. I, Amber Brown, got very mad at my dad when he picked a house without me. Now Mom and Max are letting me decide…except for one thing. I have decided…I want to stay exactly where I am. I like my room. I like knowing exactly where everything is. I like my friends. I like knowing my neighborhood.

  Mom and Max said that once we find the house and buy it, they are going to get married. They aren’t going to wait until June. We will all move into the house at the same time.

  They won’t promise me that we will stay in the same town.

  That means that I may not even stay in the same school.

  I, Amber Brown, always feel bad for kids who have to move and go to a new school, especially in the middle of the year.

  I remember how bad I felt for Justin, my best friend who had to move.

  Mrs. Holt is in the front of the classroom, taking attendance.

  I really like Mrs. Holt.